Ep. 46 Your Work Is Not Your Worth - From A Recovering Overachiever
As a kid, I was 100% that nerdy organized kid. I loved to organize Barbies and give them complex background stories versus actually playing make-believe with them.
I was the teacher's pet and I was consistently rewarded for good behavior, being a “good kid” with excellent grades, and I thrived in that. I liked the accolades from adults in high school. I did every club I could. I did every extra credit assignment I could, and that really only escalated when I was in college.
There I was getting a major in biomedical engineering, with two minors at the same time, I ran the Big Brothers Big Sisters Club and a Relay for Life event. This pattern didn't stop when I left college, either.
My whole life, I heard the phrase, how do you do it all? I'd get asked that by friends or from colleagues, or I'd hear things like, “Oh my gosh, Chelsey, do you ever slow down?” “Do you ever stop?” “Do you ever say no?”
And I took pride when someone asked me that question; I thought it made me look important or special or impressive.
I wanted to be that woman that was balancing it all and making it look easy.
But the real answer was that I was tired.
I weaponized self-care
I often joked with my therapist that I would weaponize self-care. I would take the things that were supposed to be relaxing and weaponize them somehow.
Why go for a casual run when I could train for a half marathon?
I would find the things that were supposed to be relaxing and make it a challenge. I had a reading goal every year. I would sign up for all different kinds of gyms and weight classes.
I went through something that was out of my control.
My husband and I started to try for a baby, and we struggled, and after our second miscarriage, I dove back into work even deeper because I was sad and I was confused, and I didn't know what else to do at that point. This was just something I couldn't fix. I couldn't figure it out. And so I dove back into work. I dove back into my business and one day I was talking to my sister and sharing everything that was going on, and she asked me the question,
“Where would a baby even fit in your life right now?”
That question stopped me in my tracks and forced me to start evaluating how I spent my time. I started saying no. I started saying no to myself. No to the unnecessary things that were coming my way that I could have added to my plate.
I started dealing with the uncomfortable feeling of having work be just the work that I do and not a part of my personality.
As a woman, it's really easy to fall into that people pleaser role. It's really easy to be the person who raises our hand when we see someone in need and volunteer for it because we want to make others happy. We want to make others proud, and we want that reciprocal feeling of doing something that helps, but it can't be at the cost of our health and our wellness and the things that we love to do.
What productivity isn’t
Productivity is not just crossing a bunch of things off your to-do list. It's not this hustle culture that happened for so many years. It's certainly not what makes you important or valuable to the world.
How I can support you
I don't need to tell you how to be an effective person because you are, that's how you got to this point. But I can show you how to manage your energy so that you're not exhausted at the end of the day, and you have energy for the people that you love and for the hobbies that you love and for the things that you want to do.
When we work together, I can show you how to build systems so that you start each day confident that what you're working on is the right thing, and then you end your day feeling accomplished no matter how many tasks you crossed off your list.
A New Group for You
If you have found that your screen time has skyrocketed recently or at any point within recent history, It's probably because you're at that paralyzed point where you're so overwhelmed and stressed because there are so many things you gotta do. You reach for your phone, you putter around the house, you clean up a little bit here and there, and at the end of the day, you didn't get anything done.
I've absolutely been there and I know how to support you.
My ultimate goal of working with clients is to create personalized systems that you can get more done in less time, and a lot of that is just by figuring out what's gonna work best for you. Not a complicated system, but one that’s personal to you.
If you're an entrepreneur, hopefully, this does make you more money in your business because you're going to be more efficient in what you can do.
You're going to be working on the right things to help you reach your goal instead of all the shiny objects that distract us from your ultimate goals. And hopefully, you're not gonna reach that burnout point because the last thing I want is for you to come to me resenting and hating your business when you're ready to burn it all down.
So again, if you are ready to work with less stress, less guilt, less overwhelm, to have a personal routine and structure that works for you, if you're ready to take things off your plate because you know how many things you got done on that day is not what dictates your value to the world, then we absolutely need to be in partnership and in community with each other.
I have the tools. I have years of experience, not only personally but as a business owner. As a certified behavioral change specialist, I will ensure that we can make lifelong changes together.
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Have questions? Reply to this email or send me a DM - I'm always happy to chat!
Free resources For You
Grab Chelsey’s free guide to understanding procrastination so that you can maximize your productivity.
Schedule a free 30-minute consultation call with Chelsey so that you can create a booked-out business without burnout.
Your Next Steps
I’d love to know your thoughts on this episode so please leave a review. When you do, you'll receive Chelsey’s free guide to understanding procrastination so that you can maximize your productivity. Make sure you post your review on social media and tag Chelsey to receive it!
Need advice on going from overwhelmed to under control? Schedule a free 30-minute consultation call with Chelsey so that you can create a booked-out business without burnout.
Connect with Chelsey Newymyer
Website: https://chelseynewmyer.com/
Instagram: @chelseyncoaching
