Habits vs. Routines

Do you get up and go for a run without thinking about it?

I didn't think so!

Your workouts, cleaning your house, and eating healthy are all part of your routines rather than habits you've created.

A habit is an impulse to do a behavior with little or no conscious thought. Not doing a habit feels uncomfortable, like not washing your hands after using the toilet or not wearing your favorite piece of jewelry. Habits are a type of learning. By forming a habit, the brain frees the mind to do other things without deliberation.

A routine, on the other hand, is a behavior frequently repeated. Therefore, skipping a routine doesn't feel bad and can be easily missed or forgotten since it requires additional effort.

Let's dig a little deeper.

The main difference between a habit and a routine is the level of consciousness involved with the action.

There have been some wonderful books on the topics of habit creation. A personal favorite is Atomic Habits by James Clear, which has you break the habit you want to create into the smallest possible step. Want to work out? Start by putting your sneakers on. Want to read every day? Put your book on your pillow in the morning, so it's there when you go to bed, etc. The overarching theme is to create the classic habit loop of Cue - Routine - Reward - Repeat. We begin to rely on the cue without thought to complete the action or behavior.

A cue will trigger a habit. The cue is often something we are not even aware of consciously. For example, you could walk into your favorite coffee shop without thinking about it or pick up your phone after every ding without processing the chime.

A routine requires more deliberate practice. Your routine can be more complicated such as going to the gym, which requires multiple steps and decisions, or they can be simple routines such as making your bed in the morning.

Building both habits and routines requires regular and repeated actions, but habits eventually happen with little to no conscious thought, whereas routines continue to require a higher degree of intention and effort.

A routine can become a habit, but it's not automatic and requires a lot of work.

This is where most people get stuck and frustrated.

We want to be able to put the hard stuff we have to do on autopilot, so we don't have to think about it. Wouldn't it be great if my routine of creating content on Mondays became a habit, and I didn't even have to think about what I post on Instagram?!

Unfortunately, habits don't work that way.

When we fail to form a habit, we tend to blame ourselves. I know I did.

You must understand motivation to determine if an action should become a habit or a routine. Motivation is the desire to escape discomfort. Our brains tell our bodies what to do when we are uncomfortable: You're hungry, so you eat, you're cold, so you put on a jacket, etc. This applies to psychological discomfort as well.

When there is a task we don't like to do, we will avoid it until the discomfort or pain of not doing them gets to be too much. You may recognize this phenomenon as procrastination! If you can procrastinate on something, that is a telltale sign the task is a routine and not a good candidate to become a habit. Again, think back to common habits - can you wait to wash your hands after using the bathroom? No, ew.

So, how do we create a routine?

Since routines don't happen automatically, we must ensure we give them the proper time and dedication. The trick here is to plan what you will do and when you will do it. This "implication intention" will ensure you are more likely to find the time on your calendar and follow through on completing the routine.

Another important step, welcome the discomfort. Again, routines require effort that is likely going to make you uncomfortable. Knowing this ahead of time means you can anticipate the discomfort and think of it as part of the journey rather than as a reflection of your level of dedication. Everyone who has ever made a routine has struggled at some point.

Pre-commit to following through on the routine by finding an accountability partner and/or removing all distractions. Set up reminders, get a friend, and do the thing!

In summary:

Not all behaviors can become habits, and trying to turn hard-to-do tasks into habits can cause frustration and failure. Accepting that some behaviors will never be "effortless" or done without conscious thought and effort is OK. However, suppose you're focusing on building solid routines, leaning into the discomfort, and giving yourself grace. In that case, you'll have a much better chance of sticking to what's important to you, and (fingers crossed) that routine blossoms into a habit.